Sit, boy, sit

Spilled bowls, stolen fries and sidewalk-level sightings

By RYAN ROSE WEAVER

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I am not in a state of confusion or delusion about whether my dog is actually my child.

Eko is a big brown lab mix. He has no qualms about licking the floor, sleeping in dirt, chewing on raw bones or sniffing poop. He's sweet enough when snuggled on the couch, but show him a squirrel and it's not hard to remember that he's one evolutionary step away from a wolf.

One would have to wonder, then, why I would want him at my side while I sip wine and sample dishes in a genteel restaurant setting. However, there are plenty of people (probably those with more petite, highly pedigreed pups) who want to take their dogs everywhere, everywhere, everywhere. So when the Dig asked me to investigate the doggy patio scene, I agreed, taking my dog to places where I thought he might be welcome—Brookline, the South End, the usual doggy haunts.

It was stressful.

First we went to The Fireplace [1634 Beacon St., Washington Sq., Brookline. 617.975.1900. fireplacerest.com], where even the waiters bring their dogs to work. The waitress brought Eko a big bowl of water, and we settled in. There were times when he lay quietly under the table, sprawled out on the sidewalk, but often my boyfriend and I had to pull him away from passerby or blurt a quick no! as he invaded someone's personal space. Luckily, the diners to my left were enthralled with his antics, allowing him to rest his big brown head in their laps as he's wont to do, while the diners on our right politely ignored his attempts to reach their rolls with his long tongue edging the table. I can't imagine what they might do if he were my toddler and not my pet.

Next stop: The OtherSide Café [407 Newbury St., Boston. 617.536.8437. myspace.com/othersidecafeboston]. My dog enjoys raw food, acting aloof and staring off pensively, so I thought he'd fit right in with the crowd. He did. Throughout the night, a revolving cast of counterculture kids developed hard and fast crushes on my canine Conor Oberst—from an adorable boy in a v-neck who twice rescued Eko's water bowl from tipping, to a red-lipsticked waif in a biker jacket who entertained him while we scarfed down our huevos rancheros. Even the busy hostess stooped down several times, gold chains a-tinkling, to coo and cuddle him. "He's not like other dogs," she said. "He doesn't try to kiss me."

Eventually, though, it got loud and rowdy on the patio. Between the sirens and jeering jocks on the street, and tipsy girls in short-shorts stumbling and stepping on his paws, I knew Eko wasn't enjoying himself as much as I was. By attempting to embody this bohemian, my-dog-goes-with-me-everywhere-because-we're-totally-connected image, I was kept from actually enjoying the scene, the wine or the weather because the conditions were far from optimal for my buddy. So we closed our tab, paid for our beet chips and left for home before 11 o'clock.

Our final destination was Tremont 647 [647 Tremont St., South End, Boston. 617.266.4600. tremont647.com], easily the most overtly dog-friendly of the lot, and a standout (even in dog-centric South End) for their Polka Dog Bakery [256 Shawmut Ave., South End, Boston. 617.338.5155. polkadog.com] biscuits and friendly servers. Although Tremont's no longer reliably serving the "dog menu" they debuted earlier this summer, the pajama-clad brunch waitstaff still showed Eko a lot of love, bringing him treats and calling him a good doggy, even after he snatched a handful of fries from my boyfriend's plate (a sneaky trick he'd never try at home) and spilled his water all over the patio. We even snuck him some fancy salmon and burger, the remainders of our own meals, and felt happy for not wasting our leftovers. All would have been well if it hadn't started to sprinkle—because when you have a dog in tow, you can't simply duck inside the restaurant. So we stood in the rain, dodging patio umbrellas as they careened into the street, and waited for it all to pass.

We then headed to the custom-designed, six-month-old Joe Wex Dog Recreation Space [1277 Washington St., South End, Boston. peterspark.org] around the corner at Peter's Park, where Eko got to run in the gravel, check out the ladies and sniff mutt butts. Because, despite it all, we still dig our dog. He's wonderfully sweet, loving and snuggly. We can't imagine our lives without him, and like many pet owners, we firmly think he gives more to us than we can give to him.

We just think 'when it comes to social settings, we'll stick to our kind, and he can stick to his.